by Dan Swanson
Shortly before midnight, Tammi Paige was curled up in the living room on the sofa in front of the fireplace. She was wearing her favorite silk baby-doll nightie as she snuggled under a big, fluffy blanket, fortified with a bunch of Dinah Shore, Doris Day, and Patti Page 45s stacked on the spindle. She sampled a Ronrico Gold and Coke and a big bowl of buttered popcorn as she eagerly turned the pages of the latest Harlequin bodice-ripper. I can’t believe they wore those awful corset things! she thought. The things they went through, just to look good for the boys.
She sat up, startled — she had just heard something moving in the dining room, and then a few seconds later, in the solarium. She quietly got to her feet and moved silently across the carpet. Now that she was concentrating, she could barely make out the sounds of someone breathing in the solarium. She slid her head cautiously into the solarium; by the dim, reflected light from the streetlights out front, she could just make out the silhouette of a man, holding her brand-new Chinese Desert Cat in one hand, and something she couldn’t make out in the other.
Instantly, Tammi projected the sound of a tremendous explosion into the solarium.
BOOOOM!
The intruder was knocked off his feet and dropped everything as he tumbled to the floor. Tammi flipped on the wall light and stepped through the door to the solarium, then jerked back in shock as she saw him waving a gun. She was back out of sight when he fired, but instead of shooting at her, he blasted out the floor-length window, and when Tammi cautiously peeked around the doorframe again, the room was empty, and she could hear him running down the street. She could also hear Alex rushing downstairs, anxious to find out if Tammi had been hurt. And not far away, she heard the siren of a police squad car wailing into the night.
Within a few minutes, a prowl car pulled up in front of the house. By then, Tammi had managed to reassure Alex that she was okay, both women had put on their house robes, and they had discovered that the thief had dropped the Desert Cat statuette and a large burlap bag as he fled. They put the statuette back where it belonged, as they already had a good idea who the thief might have been, and they wanted to capture him on their own. The officers in the patrol car had called for a detective as soon as they heard the shooting, and he arrived only minutes later, allowing the patrolmen to return to their patrol.
Since Alex hadn’t seen the thief, she was out in the street reassuring their neighbors while Tammi was telling the story to the Detective. “When I startled him, he pulled a pistol and shot out the window, and then ran. He dropped that bag there–” Tammi pointed at the bag on the floor. “–and we haven’t touched it. As far as I can tell, there’s nothing missing.”
Police Detective Stuart McMillan was a big, handsome, dark-haired man with a bushy mustache, in his early thirties, and he seemed to be more interested in her waist-length hair than her story. She shook her head, causing her hair to shimmer and ripple, and readjusted her robe, unaware of the dazzling glimpses underneath that she was providing him. “Look, Detective Stuart — can I call you Stuart?” Tammi asked sweetly, flashing him her brightest smile. “It’s late, and we’re really tired. If you need anything else, I’d be happy to come down to the station house tomorrow.”
“Certainly, Miss Pay… uh, Tammi,” replied Stuart. “I’m based at the Park Station — you know, the station near Kezar Stadium?” She nodded. “Ask for me at the desk at three o’clock.” He was actually off-duty tomorrow, but he would come in anyway. He was going to give this case his personal attention. Finally, he left.
Good thing I wore my hair down tonight, Tammi thought to herself. Alex wouldn’t approve of her teasing Detective McMillan. She sniffed — sometimes it seemed as if Alex disapproved of everything fun.
“I guess we’re going back to Far Eastern Treasures?” she asked her partner after they finally got a big plastic drop cloth taped over the broken window.
“You betcha! After the screwy way he behaved this morning, I’d bet a thousand bucks Lei Chiu was the burglar… if I had a thousand bucks,” joked Alex Silverstone. She had received a nice inheritance from her parents, but had spent most of it buying this big old house, situated partly up one of the famous San Francisco hills. “We’ll take the bike. Hurry, let’s get changed.”
“Wheee!” Tammi squealed. She just loved riding the vintage World War II electric motorcycle with sidecar. The acceleration was incredible, and the silence with which the electric motor drove the bike made her feel as if she was flying.
“I’m driving,” Alex continued flatly. Tammi just shook her head.
***
A few minutes later, now dressed in their heroic costumes, Tammi Paige followed Alex Silverstone as she pushed the heavy electric motorcycle into the mild San Francisco fog out onto the street.
As Palette, Alex wore a skintight bodysuit that had probably started life colored pale yellow, but which now looked as if it had been used as an artist’s drop cloth, as it was covered in spatters, drips, and blotches in every color an artist would use. She also wore a black domino mask, red gauntlets and boots, and a black beret.
As Miss Music, Tammi wore a short, bright red skirt, a loose, low-cut pale blue shiny silk blouse with puffy sleeves, covered by a short-sleeve, open-front jacket with padded shoulders in the same pale blue, red knee-high boots that laced up the front, a pale blue tri-cornered hat with red trim, and the black domino mask du jour. Her hair now hung in a single long braid down the middle of her back.
They mounted the bike, Alex twisted the throttle, and they zoomed away. The bike didn’t make a sound, which was helpful in concealing their nocturnal activities from the neighbors. Palette had to drive slowly because of the fog, but she didn’t think getting there a few minutes later would make much of a difference at this point, as the police had already delayed them for over an hour. The duo known as the AVant Guard were headed back to Chinatown.
An interesting thought occurred to her as she contemplated the benefits of the silent motorcycle, and she leaned over to talk to Miss Music. “Say, Tams, your powers are sound-related — do you think you could project silence like you project sounds?”
Miss Music projected her voice directly into Palette’s ear, so she wouldn’t have to shout in return. “I’ve never thought about it. That would be really cool, wouldn’t it? Tell you what, why don’t you say something, and I’ll see.”
Alex began to sing, and Tammi winced. If this use of her power just required motivation, Alex’s singing should provide all she needed. She concentrated, trying to project silence the same way she projected sound, but there was no change in that horrid singing.
“You can stop now. Please?” Tammi vocalized into her partner’s ear. “I can add sounds to whatever is already there, but I don’t know how to make noises less loud by adding more sound to them. But it sure would be a useful power.”
“Well, it was worth trying,” Palette responded. “Keep thinking about it. You never know what we might still learn about our powers!” She turned her attention back to driving carefully through the fog. Luckily it wasn’t very dense, or even with streetlights, she wouldn’t have been able to see the way.
“Yeah. Did you realize that we’re just like that couple in the parable?” Miss Music asked, totally out of the blue.
The only couple her partner could think of was the married couple, Bi Yu and Chung Yu. “Tams, we’re not… quite just like them,” she replied dryly.
“Yeah, they rescued the Desert Cat using our powers!” the Audible Ace insisted. “We’re in a parable! I wonder who’s gonna be the dragon?!”
Alex had painted the mural years before she met Tammi, and until now she had never realized that, indeed, Bi Yu and Chung Yu — which Liling Kam had told her translated as Jade Bell and Jade Paint Brush — had captured sight and sound and used them to recover the Desert Cat. But all Tammi had done at the time was wonder about riding a tiger in her latest bikini. She shook her head in disbelief, then concentrated on driving.
***
Parking near the back of the store, they decided to enter through the loading dock. Even with her enhanced vision, Palette had difficulty seeing through the fog, so they moved very carefully. They were stunned to find that the door was already wide open, the lock and doorframe broken as if someone had kicked through it earlier that evening.
Palette projected the illusion of black shadows on her body and costume, and in the fog and dim light, Miss Music found it even more difficult to see her. Wreathed in her own personal shadow, the Photonic Paladin silently crept into the Receiving area. Across the room, through the entrance to the storeroom, she saw two glowing lights that looked like eyes. On the floor in front of Tammi, a message of dimly glowing red letters appeared.
“Someone in the storeroom. Wait!” Tammi Paige concentrated, and she could indeed hear two heartbeats in the next room. The second one sounded like a nervous man, but not someone who was aware of an enemy approaching. “He doesn’t know you’re there,” whispered Miss Music, sounding directly in one ear of her partner.
The figure Palette was stalking seemed to be wearing some kind of mask, which concealed its face even to her enhanced vision, but the eyes continued to glow, somehow capturing and reflecting what little light there was in the room, much like a cat’s eyes. The shadowy figure remained motionless as the Luminous Legend inched closer. Then, judging she was close enough, she dived forward in a tackle. She had expected to hit the watcher solidly in the chest, but instead she hit something very light and crashed down on a tabletop, which then collapsed to the floor. She started swearing, and the room filled with a dim red light, much like the light in a darkroom.
Miss Music rushed into the room, which was even more cluttered than the shop itself, and saw Palette lying on a tabletop on the floor, her body glowing ruby red. Her arms were wrapped around a very large stuffed owl.
“A #^@%!*& stuffed animal!” Palette cursed. “&*%%@#^ eyes are glass!”
“Say, I didn’t know you could glow like that!” the Tuneful Titan said to her partner in wonder.
“I didn’t, either, but if I can project dark, it seemed logical that I should be able to project light as well,” replied the Aesthetic Avenger smugly, glad to change the subject. She was sure Tammi would tease her about this fiasco for weeks to come.
“Uh, Palette… there’s still someone in the room with us!” Miss Music said, suddenly remembering. At that exact instant, a dragon about the size of a pony, which had been standing motionless next to the wall throughout the prior commotion, suddenly leaped forward with a roar, directly at the Sonic Superstar.
Miss Music instantly dived into a somersault and bounced up under the dragon’s stomach with both fists extended above her head — and she ripped through the beast’s belly and then through its upper back. “It’s only #^@%!*& papier-mâché!” the Sonic Superstar yelled in frustrated anger as a man started laughing.
Palette changed her illusion to white light finally, and the two women turned toward the source of laughter, murder in their eyes.
“Hey, it was all in fun!” Their target was a slightly chubby man about as tall as Palette, dressed in a dark charcoal gray suit, navy blue tie, and white shirt, wearing a bowler hat, with a camera hung around his neck. “You guys were never scared, we… erp!” He quickly raised both hands in front of him as he realized that Palette was about to take a swing at him. “Hold it! I’m one of the good guys!” He backed up until he ran into a wall, trying to avoid the Aesthetic Avenger, who continued to stalk forward, her fists clenched.
“Hold on, Palette! I recognize this guy,” Miss Music yelled at her partner. “He’s Phoenix Barrow, a reporter for the San Francisco Chronicle. Somebody would probably miss him if you kill him!”
“Yeah, that’s me. And you’re Palette and Miss Music, San Francisco’s leading super-heroes,” he replied quickly. “We’re on the same side!” he insisted.
Palette stopped stalking toward him. “Your name’s really… Phoenix?” she asked incredulously. “What kind of parents would name their kid after a city in Arizona? No, never mind that. What the heck are you doing here?”
“I’m tracking down a smuggling ring, and I got a tip that this store’s involved,” the reporter replied.
Palette started to object, but thought about Lei Chiu’s actions and the attempted robbery tonight, and kept silent. She was sure her friend Liling Kam couldn’t be involved in anything illegal, but she didn’t know Lei Chiu. His travels in the Orient certainly gave him the opportunity to be involved in a smuggling ring.
“Guys, there’s something bad going on in the basement,” Miss Music broke in anxiously. “I can barely hear somebody yelling from down there!”
“That way!” Palette pointed to the door that led from the storeroom into the store. She had been in the basement previously, back when she painted the mural. Phoenix started moving toward the door, but she stopped him. “Not you, Mr. Reporter. This is our case.”
He bristled. “And it’s my story. I got here before you guys did, and I’m going to follow it through. Besides, you can’t stop me from going!”
“I think we can, even if it requires knocking you out and tying you up,” the Princess of Projection responded, getting bristly herself.
“Geez, you two, cut it out!” Miss Music interrupted. “I can’t believe you’re fighting when someone is screaming in agony! You can’t hear it, but it sounds like someone is being tortured down there. We need to stop it!”
The two looked at her, looked at each other, and snarled, then turned toward the door. “Besides,” the Harmonic Honey projected her whisper into Palette’s ear, “…he’s really cute.” And that didn’t help the Photonic Paladin’s mood one bit. She had to smile silently, though, at her partner’s next smug whisper. “Told you there’d be a dragon!”